imperfect

I am imperfect. I fall short and i make mistakes. I think i got kind of busy on here pointing out others flaws without looking at my own. So i’ve done that and I’ve come to this conclusion: im not perfect and I never will be but i can strive to be.

Who Am I

so i think i write many blogs that speak to other people (as well as myself) but today i decided to write a blog about me my strengths, my weaknesses, my shortcomings, my goals, and who  I am as a person. I think im gonna write this like you’ve never met me i don’t know why but i feel like so here goes…My name is Shay Benthall. I am a Christ-follower this however, does not mean im perfect. In fact i fall short all the time thats why i need God’s grace and forgiveness to pick me up the all too many times i fall. I heard it put this way God loves you just the way you are but loves you way too much to let you stay that way. Isn’t that awesome?!?!? I am not perfect. My biggest flaw is probably laziness. really its become an issue. I struggle with it every day but i’m finally trying to work on it. I like to think i’m a people person. I believe that God has given me the gift to be able to communicate with people- all types of people. I like to be around people i like to change people–let me rephrase that I like it when i finally stop thinking about myself enough to let God change people through me. Its not me who does the changing. I’ve been told im funny and fun to be around. I like to make people laugh and I LOVE to laugh I honestly think it is one of the greatest gifts we have is laughter. umm I don’t like it when people walk slow in front of me -not cool. I also don’t like when people smack its quite gross sounding and i don’t like it when people throw pity parties for themselves again-not cool. my family is number one next to God of course. they are my world and what keeps me going. i love them. they are a group of  wild, crazy, goofy, sarcastic, hilarious people that if you don’t know you are truly missing out. my mom is my hero. i have curly hair and brown eyes. my favorite restaurant is Red Bone Alley. It is the bomb diggity. Celine Dion is my absolute favorite singer ever and probably the only person i would pay my own money to go see in concert. She has an amazing gift. i love my friends they are pretty stinking awesome. Music means a lot to me. its an escape–did i mention i play the drums its super! I passed up an opportunity to go to a Bruce Springsteen concert once. that was a dumb decision. I also was in a Jumpin J’s commercial when i was like 3, and have been in a few since then. I think this world needs a lot more love. A LOT more. I really like orange juice specifically Simply Orange. I have a best friend. her name is Chelsea. I love the simple things in life. “the best things in life are free” i believe is completely true. I’m way too addicted to facebook though lately i haven’t been getting on as much. I would rather take a bath vs. a shower anyday of the week. i’m just rambling now so thats all i have to say. thanks for reading.

Love one another

I want you to think about the things you say to people or about people…are they nice? are they mean? So i know we all like to sit here and think that we are perfect and got it all under control and we are nice wonderful little people. here’s the truth: YOU’RE NOT!!!! we are created with evil in us and this sinful heart plain and simple. but im not here to talk about how sinful we are (though i could for a long time). But i want you to think about how you treat those around you. I mean really search within you.  How long does the new kid  at school have to sit by his/herself before you go talk to them. How many people have walked in your church door without you saying a single word to them. lets take it deeper. How many people do you talk about behind their back? and don’t say you don’t because i see it all the time and we are all guilty of it at some time i know i am. guys the Bible doesn’t tell us to only love some people. it doesn’t tell us only love your best friend but not that kid who doesn’t wear the right clothes, or drive the right car, or quite have it all together. it tells us to love everyone.  this is what the Bible says in 1st John 4:7-8:

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God,because God is love.

It says let us love one another. not just some people.guys love is a gift given to us from God that is meant to be shared.

and Matthew 5:44-48  says this:

44:But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45:that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. ⁴⁶If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? ⁴⁷And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? ⁴⁸Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

guys we are supposed to show the same kind of love to our enemies that we show our best friends. now this, i know, is a very, very hard thing to do. but God didn’t ask us to do this, He commanded us.  God isn’t asking us for anything less than perfection. Now no, we will never be perfect, and thats where the grace of God comes in, but the goal is to strive to be perfect. and i don’t know about you but i don’t want to give God anything less than my absolute best. If we only love those who love us, are we not just like the rest of this world? One of the most absolutely hardest things to do is to love your enemies. God called christians to be set apart and not to follow the ways of this world but if we only love those who love us , then whats the point? our mission is to show the love of Christ through us ,and though the love of Christ is something much bigger than any of us can comprehend it is our job to try to show it as best possible. So stop thinking about yourself for two seconds to spread the love of Christ to somebody.

Worship

So im sitting here thinking, thinking about worship. For me worship is when i am closest to God, when i am in fellowship with Him. So I was talking to a friend and we were talking about worship and i was telling her my frustrations of people not truly worshiping. I was talking about how i just wish people would worship with their whole heart and like it was their last chance to do that. And we got to talking and she was kindly letting me know that thats not my place to judge, and its not, but i say this i pray that whoever you are wherever you are, may your worship be pure and true and may you give God 100%. I understand that enviornment and insecurities affect us (my wise friend made me aware of this) but I pray that you allow God to break down those barriers. So my place is NOT between you and God but i pray that you let nothing get in that spot. I pray that you just worship God in the way you see fit to give God one hundred percent.

LOVE

what do you love? i mean really love. i think its funny because we say man i love oreos or man i love those shoes, but think about it. do you not also tell your parents you love them; your friends? do you not also tell God you love him? so i want to know this is there different types of love? i’ve always considered love to be something so much deeper. i don’t really like to just dish out my “i love you’s” to anyone. Because to me love isn’t something you can explain, but i’m gonna try. Love is that thing that keeps us going.  It makes us look like abosulute fools and it makes us do the unthinkable. Its why we come home at the end of the day. Its something we desire. And when the things we love are gone, we feel a part of us is missing. I want you to think about what you love. Is it your parents? Is it your spouse? Is it your boyfriend or girlfriend? is it your friends? Is it your siblings? Is it your car?  Is it your phone? Is it music?  Is it your computer? Is it food? Is it the God of this universe?? I want you to think about how much time you invest in all of those things whether it be family, friends , or material possesions and then, think about how much time you invest in your relationship with God? So i ask you this, if you love all of those things and invest so much time in them why are we not just as willing to invest that time with our God and Savior if we love Him so much?  So i ask you think about what you really love and what your investing your time in. And why are we not willing to look like such fools and do crazy things to express our love to God. Guys, God showed us how much He loved us by sending His one and only Son to die on the cross. To take OUR place. To take on OUR burdens and sins. why?  BECAUSE HE LOVES US! and we don’t deserve it. My Jesus was beaten and bruised on a cross for my sins because He loves me that much.  He didn’t just do it for me He did it for you too. It makes me SO thankful. Because i don’t know how many people you know that would die on the cross and be beaten and battered until they were barely recognizable, for the sins of the world.  so why, if you say you love Him so much, do you continue to turn your back on Him? He is screaming out your name and your not listening. I have to listen to my own words sometimes because I’m so guilty of this as well. He just wants to spend time with you. Because He loves you.

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.

We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
So Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.

Well, I thought about You the day Stephen died,
And You met me between my breaking.
I know that I still love You, God, despite the agony.
…They want to tell me You’re cruel,
But if Stephen could sing, he’d say it’s not true, cause…

Cause He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us.
Whoa! how He loves us.
Whoa! how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.

-How He loves us-John Mark Mcmillan

sometimes…

sometimes i look around and see how much pain and longing there is in this world. and i just want to get away from it all. its almost sickening how much pain and strife there is.  why is it this way? and what am I doing to make it better?

im just sayin…

why are we so afraid of being close to God? think about it. I think that what im so scared of is actually doing what God wants me to because that might require change. I’ve learned that this is not who i want to be anymore. we make excuses not to spend time with God. i know i do. i think about how much homework i have to or what i need to study. How much time do we really spend studying or doing homework when in reality we are spending a certain amount of hours on the phone, tv, computer, friends, and family. Its not about making excuses. QUIT being afraid of what God has to show you!! He wants to be close to you. He just wants to talk. So quit being afraid of something so great so awesome, something that will be the best thing you ever do. quit it with the complacency. God didn’t call us to be complacent. I am so scared and excited about the plan God has for my life. I know that He is gonna turn my world upside down, but I am so excited for that! We are so scared that when our lives are going good if we do something different that its going to all of a sudden become a disaster. God has our ultimate good in mind. He loves us and wants you to discover the unfailing love that He has. So please please please just stop. stop being afraid of what he has to show you.

You

Are loved…even if you think you’re not. The God of this universe loves you so much that he sent his son to die for YOU.

Blessed

So, my brother and I were taking a walk tonight around the neighborhood and we got to talking. we were talking about what a pretty night it was, and might i add it was gorgeous. So im sitting here thinking and talking, and we start talking about our blessings. How often do we really, i mean really, think about how truly blessed we are. There is a lake in my neightborhood and Logan and i were both like think about it, that lake is so small in comparison to the whole world God created, but this lake alone, is…beautiful. And we can never take for granted the little blessings we have. So, Logan and I continue our walk and i was listing all the things i was thankful for, all of the blessings i have. They were the following: obvisously my friends and family and my house–you know the easy ones. But then i was like how often to we thank God that we have legs to walk. Here i am, completely able to walk around my neighborhood any time i want, and i just take it for granted. think about how many people are born without legs, or are sick and have to get them removed, or whatever awful thing happened. and we just walk everywhere like its no big deal. guys these people would give anything to be in our position… we have sooooo much. we don’t wonder where our next meal is coming from, we don’t wash our clothes in dirty water, we have a new clean outfit to wear everyday, we have nice cars to drive, we have roofs over our heads we have sooo much and we just take it for granted…or at least i know i do sometimes. but guys i’m just asking you too look around and be thankful for what you have and quit complaining about what you don’t. be thankful. and thank God you are so blessed.

Impact

so i’m stealing this idea from a friend and its simply a list of people who have impacted me in a major way…see if you’re there!! 1) you are absolutely amazing no one will ever ever take the place of you in my heart…you brought me into this world (thank you) you are my absolute number one hero…you’re so strong and so giving. i thank you from everything in my being for being the person you are and for shaping me into the person I am and becoming.

2) you are an amazing woman of God who is constantly seeking after what He wants for your life. you are always there to set me straight, no matter if it hurts my feelings or not… i know you do it out of love. you are an amazing sister, friend, and mentor. I sware you are one of the sweetest people i have ever met…genuinely kind and loving. thank you for being and awesome person i love you.

3) you are a person who is constantly, constantly teaching me patience. it gets very hard and i wish you would change some of your ways but i love you reguardless.

4)you are the only person i know who can make me laugh while i am flaming mad at you…you have a way to make me smile even when i want nothing more than to punch you in the face…haha. i will look after you til the day i die whether you want me to or not. i love you to death and love spending time with you. you are becoming more independent and more grown up every day…this saddens me…but i know its a part of life. you’re a great friend and brother. you teach me so much. i love you

5)you are very wise. wise beyond your years, i would say. you and I have known each other for about two and a half years now and i’ve never had a better friend. you are always there to knock me back to my knees when i need it and we have an absolutely amazing time together. i have made too many memories to recall with you but i cherish every one of them. when you go off to college its gonna be difficult for me, but you are gonna do an amazing job. i love you. i have your back anytime and i know you have mine. you’re my best friend and you are an awesome person. i love your passion for God. you are truly amazing.

6)you are probably the most girly person i have ever had the pleasure of meeting. you are such a nice person and so much fun to hang out with. i loving hanging out with you anytime because i know it will be fun! you make me laugh so much. you will probably always have a better fashion sense than me and probably always be better dressed. you are a genuine God fearing woman, and i adore you for that.i love you and love spending time with you!

7)girl you are so sweet. they say “the bigger the better” i say “good things come in small packages”. i love you. im glad your love for God and people is not as big as your body! lol i know its way bigger than that. we really haven’t known each other for very long but you’ve impacted me in a way that no one else has and i thank you for that…i love you!

8)you were a good friend and boyfriend. i learned a lot about myself and God through our relationship. i learned what i true relationship needs so i thank you for that. you still can make me laugh like nobody else…you’re crazy fun loving and i hope that never changes. I do hope you change some of your ways and find yourself so emerged in God that you can’t remember what life was like without Him.

9)you are my best friends parents.you guys have supported me in many many ways. you also have been there to tell me when im making a bad decision. you guys are like a second pair of parents to me. thanks for always letting me stay at your house and eat your food. you guys are the best and i love you both!

10)you are a person who i can’t describe. you make me laugh at some of the dumb things you say sometimes but i love you for it. you are like a sister to me. you fall in love waaaay to easily but…whatever floats your boat. you listen to me talk when i need somebody to listen…thank you. i love you!

11)you and I love to jam to music in the car (whatever you like) and we laugh. you’re mom is pretty much a gangster. i love spending time with you and hanging out anytime! love you!

12) i don’t know where to start with you we have waaaay to many inside jokes…from “why are my farts popping” to “its nutricious and delicious” i think we both have a little thing called obsession with Celine Dion. Nobody quite understands me like you do. it makes me sad that you are off at college and i don’t get to see you as much as i would like. you make me laugh till my stomach hurts and i love it. i love you and your passion for Christ and seeking His will. I love you don’t ever change (except for the better)!

13) Last but not least, you came in and out of my life very quickly. we got to know each other very fast, and while you were in my life you impacted me a whole lot. I’m sad we don’t get to hang out very often…or really at all, but its ok. I’m sad that you are so busy all the time, but i know you’re doing God’s work. you are a strong girl who loves God–never change that!